Author: Mark Banschick, MD

November 25th, 2013

Simon has been caught cheating on his wife, Chelsea. She's been a dedicated wife and a wonderful mother, and Simon's been having sex with her best friend. Now contrite, Simon admits that Chelsea is supportive, loyal, and loving and he cannot justify his infidelity. When Chelsea stumbles on evidence of the affair, she's blindsided and her whole world shatters. Even Simon admits that he made a huge mistake and acknowledges that what he did was in …
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Author: Mark Banschick, MD

November 25th, 2013

Jenny and Peter live in a white picket-fenced house on Washington Drive with their two young kids. For the most part, their lives are vanilla -- pedestrian. Peter's work as a lawyer means that he spends long hours at his firm, while Jenny's day follows a typical soccer mom's schedule. Every day pretty much follows the same routine. After dinner, and once the kids have been put to bed, Jenny and Peter have one-on-one time. They make plans for th …
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Author: Mark Banschick, MD

November 25th, 2013

let's elaborate on this subject, and go over some some precautions that may help you when dealing with a narcissistic ex husband or wife. You may think that a narcissist is simply selfish and draining to deal with, but individuals with such a demanding sense of self are sometimes teetering close to the edge.

The danger of divorce and the narcissist: Divorce brings many pressures to bear on anyone going through it; worries about money, …
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November 25th, 2013

I work in a beautiful suburb north of Manhattan, and in this child friendly place of great schools and involved parents, we have just witnessed a horrifying tragedy. According to news reports, an upper middle class neighborhood family was in the midst of a difficult divorce. Like many in their position, they lived in the same house, she an Ivy graduate, and he, a respected local attorney. Now this couple and their two children are gone, apparent …
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November 25th, 2013

When you see the word "divorce", what comes to mind? Do you think of a broken home and an unhappy family? Do you think of parents who fight too much and talk too little? Do you see the words "adultery", "abuse" and "dishonesty" in your mind's eye? Perhaps you think of liberation: one adult is no longer bound to another. One adult, who has spent years in an unhappy, unfulfilling, or for some reason un-"right" relationship, is finally free to le …
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Author: Mark Banschick, MD

November 25th, 2013

The first thing parents are taught to say to their kids upon a divorce is that “It's not your fault.” There’s a real reason for this. Children have magical thinking and assume that the divorce has something to do with them.  Dutifully, responsible parents want to lighten their load and reassure their children that the family break up is exclusively due to adult issues.
The children are free and clear of blame. But is …
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January 22nd, 2014

(CNN) -- There was that distant-feeling New Year's kiss at midnight. Valentine's Day, a holiday based on setting hearts aflutter, was full of awkward pauses and glances over souffle at the person you used to love. Come March, it's time to turn over a new leaf. In recent years, January has earned the nickname "Divorce Month" -- a less appealing title than National Pet Month (May) or National Honey Month (September), though divorce can surely be b …
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November 25th, 2013

Can you forgive?  From Jews preparing for Yom Kippur, the holiest Jewish day, to Catholics going to confession before Easter, all religions understand the healing power of forgiveness. Everyone can relate to carrying a grudge that's gone on for too long or feeling guilty for a wrongdoing that needs to be atoned. This is how we are built. As long as there are relationships, there will be a need for forgiveness. Forgiveness is a powerful an …
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Author: Mark Banschick, MD

August 17th, 2014

Calling out Joyce Carol Oates Social Media – When Good People Do Bad Things Joyce Carol Oates is an important contemporary American author and Princeton professor.  I am calling her out today with no ill intent. The purpose is not to embarrass a great writer, but rather demonstrate how easily social media can become a source of horrific propaganda, especially when placed in the hands of an honorable person. Ms. Oates’ twitter acc …
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